Healthiness and Change

I have several things on my mind right now. All of them are great. Ha. I just feel like this is such a jubilant time in my life. So many things to be thankful for and so many wonderful lessons that I am learning. I am so blessed. First thing on my mind is how wonderful healthy relationships are. There is something so freeing and so comforting about being in a relationship that is healthy and grounded in faith. I feel like you know that a relationship is healthy by the fruit if bears. Just like in our own personal lives. If there is life being given by the relationship, then it is working properly, if not, then I feel like it is dying. For example, right now I am blessed with a wonderful relationship, I know it is healthy because there are good boundaries. We aren’t living in the physical like many relationships do, there are emotional boundaries too that allow us to grow together over time. Relationships are not a race that has to be rushed through. They are like a fine wine ( or juice ;) ) that should be enjoyed. I see life around me being restored and friendships being mended through this relationship. I see an honesty of conversation between the two of us that allows fear to take a back seat. No games, no manipulation, its great. That doesn’t mean it is devoid of any frustrations or insecurities, it just means that in the midst of those things, there is life and freedom. A thing I don’t think I have ever experienced in a relationship until now. I feel like there are so many people who settle, for relationships that they were not intended to be in. I feel people settle for a lack of connection, a lack of attraction, a lack of trust, all for the sake of being in a relationship and feeling loved. From someone who has made that mistake too many times to count, let go. God truly is sufficient. I always would scoff at such a statement, but although it is hard at times, a period of time, weather that be 3 months of 3 years with just an intimacy with God is so restoring and refreshing. Then, if and when it is in God’s plan for us to be in a relationship, you are able to function better, trust more, communicate more freely. You are not dependant on them for everything, to be your rock, because you have a rock in Christ that will never change or go away. This too is something that has to be maintained when relationships do come in. It is easy, if you allow yourself, to get swept away by the feelings and emotions another person might give you, but that goes back to being in a healthy relationship. If that is present and God is there, then that process will be all the easier….not easy….just more grounded. I feel as though I am rambling a bit, but I was just feeling thankful and wanted to express and affirm to others how amazing being in a healthy relationship is, and how worth the wait and patience it is.
On another note, I have been thinking more and more about what is next for me. Am I going to perform forever, or am feeling called in another direction? I am seriously considering going back to school and getting my masters in counseling. I have always enjoyed being able to care for people and listen to their stories. I feel I am blessed with ability to relate to different types of people and love on them well. Obviously not on my own accord, but Christ in me. So, if you would care to join me in prayer about this that would be greatly appreciated. The thought of going back to school is both exciting and scary at the same time. Pray for clarity of thought and direction and ultimately God’s will to be done in my life. Also, financially I feel super scared. I was spoiled by going to C of O and not having any debt, so in some ways I am ahead of the game. In others, I would rather keep myself out of that debt. Ultimately I know God will provide at the right time the steps he wants me to take, and I have just recently signed another contract to be at Sight and Sound Next year. So this would be a process and there is time to make sure it is the right thing for me and what the Lord wants for my life.
So there it is, a little update on the state of affairs with Curtis Wilson. I am blessed beyond measure and truly loved and cared for by my God and the amazing friends and family he has placed in my life.